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 My first short story ever in 4th grade. (Please comment)

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Max
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PostSubject: My first short story ever in 4th grade. (Please comment)   Thu May 15, 2008 4:19 pm

The Truth



I have one brown eye and one blue eye. The blue one has let me see so much more than others. My blue eye sees the truth. I know this. It first happened in the first grade when that no good, idiotic, ugly moron, Billy Cruzo, took my apple right out of my cubby. You know, those little rectangular holes in the wall where you put your belongings in. Anyway, Billy, who did his daily snooping in other’s cubbies when the teacher, Mrs. Baker, wasn’t looking, happened to find my lunch pail in my cubby.
Can you believe, the big bully stole my apple and began munching on it in the corner? I was right outside of the room, drinking some water in the drinking fountain, when it happened. After fifteen minutes, it was lunchtime and I went to my cubby and noticed my apple was missing. I asked Jane, who was right next to me, if she knew where that sweet fruit was. She told me that she remembered seeing Billy Cruzo snatching it from my lunch pail. After about five minutes of arguing about why she didn’t stop him, I remembered that I needed to talk to Billy about the missing apple. I made my way to him, fists clenched. I remember those dark beady eyes looking down at me. I asked him where my apple was and of course he said “I don’t know where your stinkin’ apple is, got it?”
I was kind of afraid that he was going to punch me in the nose but I wanted him to confess he took it. Billy walked so close to me, I could feel the heat radiating off of him. My legs were shaking but as brave as I was, I didn’t back down. Suddenly, my left eye, the blue one, pulsed and I had a strange feeling he was lying. No. I knew he was lying. Then, I did something no kid has ever done before and said: “Billy Cruzo! I know your lying!”
Next I knew, I was starting to wake up, lying on the rough gritty cot in the nurse’s office next to Mr. Warple’s classroom. This was the first time Billy was ever told off. I guess he didn’t like it very much because the bruise on my head throbbed like crazy. This was the first time I ever used this eye of mine. My mom and dad know about it and they think it’s a blessing and my friends back in first grade thought I was a superhero. Me? I think it’s something more. An eye that sees so much more than others. An eye that sees the truth.
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Straticus
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PostSubject: Re: My first short story ever in 4th grade. (Please comment)   Thu May 15, 2008 4:30 pm

Max is this a true story or not
doesnt mater i like it it shows bravery and pride hehe
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Max
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PostSubject: Re: My first short story ever in 4th grade. (Please comment)   Thu May 15, 2008 4:34 pm

It;s not true. Simply a dream from the mind. Thanks though. Smile
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ixion124
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PostSubject: Re: My first short story ever in 4th grade. (Please comment)   Thu May 15, 2008 4:35 pm

Big Brother is watching you o.0
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Max
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PostSubject: Re: My first short story ever in 4th grade. (Please comment)   Thu May 15, 2008 4:36 pm

Grimmie...That's a little creepy... 0.o
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Kassandra
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PostSubject: Re: My first short story ever in 4th grade. (Please comment)   Fri Jun 27, 2008 3:32 pm

thats a good story ( i know this is a old post i am just bored) i am looking at all old posts don't mind me...
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PostSubject: Re: My first short story ever in 4th grade. (Please comment)   Today at 11:52 am

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